I have this constant thought of what it would be like to disappear. It is so strange for so many people from our outside world to wildly accept and support us but the depths of who we are as an us has drastically shifted, and not in a good way. My faith tells me one thing and I try to let it drown out these fleeting feelings that hit like waves.. but there’s one that’s stays. There’s this one feeling that remains. A feeling that brings me doubt. A feeling that tells me to guard myself. A feeling that knows I’d be perfectly fine without you. So why do I stay? Why do I fight to make this work? Am I lying to myself? Why is life so confusing and hard? I thought life partners were suppose to bring about peace and not betrayal. Oh I’m sorry, did that offend you?
